It’s not you. Its Me.

(Ring)


(Ring)


(Ring)

Hello?

Oh…..hi blog.

Yes. It has been some time.

Well, no…..it’s just… well….I haven’t been in the mood to blog.

No, no! Its not you! I promise. Its me.

No I haven’t been with another blog! I promise! I haven’t blogged for anyone. It’s…..its just me. You know, its one of those phases, you know?

No, no. You’re absolutely right. What we have is special…..and I should blog. You’re right. You are absolutely right.

Yea, I would love to get together and blog soon.

Yea, that sounds great! Ok! I look forward to it. Ok. I’ll see you soon.

No I mean it! I promise! I promise I’ll post soon. Ok, alright then. I’ll soon. See you then! Ok, bye-bye.

(Click).

(Editor’s note: in the mean time, enjoy this entry from last Palm Sunday!)

The Word of God, in tongues.

So, a while back, I was asked to be the lector at church for the month of April. The lector leaders the congregation and also reads the scripture for that day. I was thrilled to do this! I have sung in church all my life, but reading felt different for some reason.

Nonetheless, I'm excited to do this. And April is no small potatoes, people. Its the big dance: Easter. Why, this April is a big month: there's Palm Sunday, Easter, the week following Easter, etc. Christianity is founded on these principles alone. High attendance, important scripture, its important that I don't flub up.

I talked with the church secretary and she said she would send me the verses by the end of the week. Well, the secretary got called for jury duty. So no verses. So I'm thinking I still have time and will cram during the children's sermon to look over my "lines" so I don't mess up. I might have to read something like "And Hepapel begat Zepo, and Zepo begat Sgralmel, and Sgralmel begat ........." yada, yada, yada. I wanted to be prepared!

So as I'm reviewing my lines during the children's sermon, I hear the pastor talk about Jesus riding into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday on a donkey. I look at the scripture I'm supposed to read and its about Jesus on Palm Sunday but no mention of a donkey. My version says "colt." Colt?! Holy crap!!! What version do I have? A special Baptist version? Do I say what version I'm reading from when I go up there? Ok Cope, just role with it. A bible is a bible. Word of God. No worries. A colt. Really?

"Today's New Testament Lesson comes from Mark Chapter 11, verses 1 through 11.

Now when they drew near to Jerusalem, to Bethphage and Bethany, at the Mount of Olives, Jesus sent two of his disciples and said to them, “Go into the village in front of you, and immediately as you enter it you will find a colt tied,

(Woo-hoo!! Your doing great kid!! Pure poetry. Verses are flowing off your tongue like honey.)

on which no one has ever sat. Untie it and bring it. If anyone says to you, ‘Why are you doing this?’ say, ‘The Lord has need of it and will send it back here immediately.’” And they went away and found a

(STUMBLE, STUMBLE, STUMBLE)

colt tied at a door outside in the street, and they untied it. And some of those standing there said to them, “What are you doing, untying the colt?” And they told them what Jesus had said, and they let them go. And they brought

(stumble, Laura says "Blah!" makes a weird face, eyes bug out and stick out her tongue in nervous twitch, stumble, MAY-DAY!!! MAY-DAY!!! stumble, stumble)

the colt to Jesus and threw their cloaks on it, and he sat on it. And many spread their cloaks on the road, and others spread leafy branches

(STUMBLE. OMG!! Did I really just say blah in front of the church?)

that they had cut from the fields. And those who went before and those who followed were shouting, “Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord! Blessed is the coming kingdom of our father David! Hosanna in the highest!” And he entered Jerusalem

(STUMBLE. OMG!!! I stuck my tongue out as I was reading the Bible!! In front of the entire church?!)

and went into the temple. And when he had looked around at everything, as it was already late, he went out to

(STUMBLE. Oh, Lord, help me!! I just had my eyes pop out of my head, made a weird face and stuck out my tongue in front of the entire congregation on Palm Sunday and there are a lot of people here!! Who is that family in the back??!! Oh man, visitors. They're going to think we speak in tongues. Awe man!! )

Bethany with the twelve.

"The word of God, for the people of God. Thanks be to God."

(Ok Laura. Maybe no one heard you. Just play it cool. Beeeeeee cooooooool.)

Mary Joe - "Psst. What version were you reading from?"

(Oh, man!)